Some (self-serving?) banking PR by Fred the Shred

June 19, 2009

fred-shred

Miracles will never cease. Sir Fred Goodwin, the former chief executive of Royal Bank of Scotland, has offered to cut his pension.

The man dubbed Fred the Shred is to reduce his pension pot by £4.7 million. Henceforth, he will have to struggle by on a mere £342,500 a year (though he has already taken a tax free lump sum of £2.7 million, which should pay for a pint of milk or three). Is it possible, we wonder, for a banker to live on such a sum?

The answer, according to Sir Fred, is ‘yes – because thanks to this masterful piece of PR, I will be redeemed in the public eye and given a grand new job again before the year is out.’

Pictured courtesy of takomabibelot: Sir Fred Goodwin, who reportedly wishes to live a normal life in Britain again.

 

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Not so right said Fred

February 2, 2012
fred hat

So Farewell, then, Sir Fred Goodwin.

Now you are just Fred.

Not Right Said Fred, but plain Fred.

The Forfeiture Committee did for you.

No one had heard of it before,

But Dave said it had to act, and it did.

Trouble is that no one knows what to think.

Is it ‘Alas, poor Fred‘,

Or ‘Hurray! Sir Fred is dead!’?

We don’t know.

Do you?

By A. Mob, aged 1,378 and a half.

London Goes AWOL

January 31, 2012
CNN

STOP PRESS:

Fed up with being stuck on the Thames in south-east England, London yesterday decided to move. In a dramatic gesture which augurs ill for the Olympics, the city upped sticks and relocated to East Anglia.

Lawyers were not consulted about the move, and the city’s precise motivation remains unclear. However, financiers fear that London’s decision is a sign that it wishes to downsize. Moreover, a source from London said: “We no longer want to be Britain’s seat of power. If the Scots can deregulate, why can’t we? East Anglia is a nice place where nothing happens. It’s time for a quiet life. Please respect our right to privacy.”

Elsewhere, Birmingham did not do anything, but Manchester was seen to be packing its bags. “There’s an opportunity for us,” said Manchester. “We can become London.”

East Anglia said: “We don’t mind. It’ll be refreshing to be associated with something other than fens and flatness.”

A cartologist at CNN, which broke the extraordinary news, was later fired.

An excellent ad if ever there was one

January 25, 2012
legovader

We seem to be visually led this week but sometimes words proliferate far too much and letting an image do the talking is no bad thing. That’s another way of saying that ACCESS Agency’s work with Lego is absolutely top drawer.