Lawyer jokes – you’ve gotta love ‘em. Here, as Jojo contemplates a lightbulb (courtesy of Doll Doll), are some of the best.
1. Lawyers and Lightbulbs.
How many lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb?
How many can you afford?
2. Lawyers and Used Car Salesmen.
What are lawyers for?
They make used car salesmen look good.
3. Lawyers and Terrorism.
What did the terrorist who hi-jacked a plane full of lawyers do?
He threatened to release one every hour if his demands weren’t met.
4. Lawyers and Sharks.
Why won’t sharks attack lawyers?
Professional courtesy.
5. Lawyers and Hell.
What do you get when you cross a lawyer with a demon from hell?
Another lawyer.
6. Lawyers and Social Functions.
A doctor and a lawyer were at a party when a man approached the doctor and asked for some advice about a heart condition. After mumbling some helpful words, the doctor turned to the lawyer and said: “How do you handle being asked for professional advice at social functions?” The lawyer replied: “Just send the bill for the advice.”
Next morning the doctor issued a $50 bill to the man with the heart condition. The same day he received a $100 bill from the lawyer.
7. Lawyers and Drink Driving.
Late one night, on a deserted road, two cars both slightly cross over the white line in the centre of the road. They collide. There is extensive damage, but neither driver is hurt. They both get out. One of the drivers is a doctor, while the other is a lawyer. The lawyer calls the police on his mobile and learns they’ll be on the scene in 20 minutes. It’s cold and damp, and both men are shaken up. The lawyer offers the doctor a drink of brandy from his hip flask, the doctor accepts, drinks thirstily and hands it back to the lawyer, who puts it away.
Aren’t you also going to have a drink?
the doctor says.
“After the police arrive,” says the lawyer.
8. Lawyers and Lawyer Jokes.
What’s wrong with lawyer jokes?
Lawyers don’t think they’re funny – and nobody else thinks they’re jokes.
